Marke Locke's CRUST

CRUST is being directed by Marke Locke and produced by Nick O'Hagan and is currently being shot in and around London. It is due for release in late Autumn 2001. Mr. C (the mantis shrimp) was made by animatronics designers.
boxing mantis.
© Rob Vector

The film tells the story of pub-landlord Bill (played by British actor Kevin McNally) a failed boxer and borderline alcoholic who feels that success has eluded him his whole life but who has no idea what to do about it. That is, he has no idea until he meets local dodgy businessman Hamid 'Anything-U-Need' Choudhury, who tantalizes him with dreams of a very unusual boxing event.

Hamid convinces Bill that there is some serious money to be made in Man versus Animal exhibition bouts. He cites the past popularity of Man versus kangaroo matches, then argues that those matches were inherently flawed because kangaroos were not only so darned cute BUT were the emblems of Australia to boot! No one could stand to be mad at such cuddly critters for long!

Ok, now listen closely 'cause here's the brilliant idea:

Under the clear blue waters of the Caribbean lives a type of crustacean, a mantis shrimp, that boxes! No one could hope to love this armored monstrosity --- its alien appearance would have been right at home in the pub scene in Star Wars! Why, the possibilities were endless: exhibition bouts in big arenas, TV appearances, even their own Gladiators style TV show with blokes in leotards hitting the shrimp with giant cotton buds!

Bill cashes in his life savings and with it buys something that would make even Godzilla tremble --- nearly 2 meters of living, breathing, kick-ass, armor-plated mantis shrimp! Can you say, "Show me the money?"

So, off they go to London to fulfill their dreams --- Bill, his best friend Steve (twenty five, ex condom factory employee and amateur boxer), his gorgeous, highly strung young girlfriend Shaz (seventeen, a trainee hairdresser who thinks she's dating beneath her and wants to get into media), and a misunderstood, club-clawed crustacean who suffers in silence but is not half as stupid as it looks.

- ASJ.

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